Thursday, March 23, 2006


She Says Halt

Fleur's a right excellent pause artist. No question, she's unmatched! Let's say we're present at a bar and football is up on the tube or something. It's true, she'll suddenly reach over everything, all of it, and her hand swoops through the sky and slams the button. FFFFBWHAM! The bottles rattle, commerce stops, the other patrons spring around. Now really, did that racket need to occur? And they look up at the screen, stopped at this perfect image of Tom Cruise, guns in each hand, jumping off a kitten's back and on each side in big white letters, it says "ONLY $50." Goosechills up and down the nervous system, folks. (Oh, but Nels didn't see, of course, he's trying to get a sticker off his nose.)

FFFBWHACK and we're back to the football. Hey, Tom Cruise wasn't on before or after, was he? Where did he come from? Kitten what? Many of these blokes in the audience get off on some recreational science here, wondering if the television is in the witches' realm, as if the UHF can be stirred in a cauldron or paired up with the wart of a salamander or moth's foot.

But I've asked her and she says it's all those tape reels in canisters back at the television studio and she claims that some of these guys get mixed up while they're splicing. Fatigue sets in and scenes get injected during sleepwalk. Or frames from other films get used to stretch out the frame rates, slow down the sports to squeeze the viewer's intensity levels past the limits nature intended. Then we see a qualified and lucid visionary like Fleur Beckwith strolls along with the passion to see these subcutaneous collisions coming. She says it's like standing on a train and moving over the surface earth and hearing people die all over the world. And saying, "Now. Now someone has died." Or waiting a few moments and then waiting and holding on a bit longer and then saying, "Okay, now. Right there a guy died." Except you hit the pause button and freezeframe keeps him from dying for his last fraction of a second. And it's not some ordinary guy. It's a celebrity in a red cowboy suit. Something universally special.

Absolutely. The Tom Cruise stunt was today even. A fellow leaned over and whispered to his associate, "She's stealing credit. She didn't really do that." The other guy had glasses, so there's no end to his knowledge, and he confirmed, "Right, isn't it? Didn't I hear you say that a studio technician took n' piece that film together? I bet she's never touched film or camera." And they nodded and clicked glasses and did a salud. People used to say that about me, that Aliss did all the work and I just lurked in the dark pushing only one or two buttons. Or that I was only quiet because I spent all day yelling at her, compelling her to wring out music just like the Beach Boys parents. Twisted, of course. But nevermind.

They've really got it mixed. All those broadcast professionals with the headphones hooked to the curly cord are the ones making mistakes. All their flubs are right there on the TV. The picture isn't even all that clear if you look close. Then take one look at that precision when Fleur seizes upon a remote control, a flair when her arms go out and she lands the infrared right in line. And when we're in a bout of lovemaking, just at the very of top of it, she'll tap my chest for a pause and say, "Oh, right there, look, look, look," and our shadows on the wall are some extravagant mural. A cat with long human hair, bobbing its head like there's a nice little guitar tune coming across the surface of the ocean.

There's what I love. She stabs a moment and gets everyone in on it. She's very giving about it. Granted, I can't believe I'm still having sex at 57. I mean that doesn't sound right at all.

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